Chapter 14 Nyemahja Ishvé

The town is a little sea of lights as we approach the outer edges after our walk downhill. Our little house was on the edge, out of the busy center but the nearest marketplace was but a short walk away. We loved that house from the moment we set foot in it for the very first time. It wasn’t very big but it was a nice house, built according to the native style common to this region and with the physiology of the inhabitants of the planet in mind of course. Retrieving the electronic key card Arzu opens the door and takes Kiyala off of his neck to put her back on her own two feet. I still have my hands full on the flowers. I’m not even sure if they would fit into a single vase. She really did her best this time. So in the kitchen I divide them into two bouquets, filling two of the largest vases we have with water to put them in under the pressure of a rather jumpy and overly active Kiyala. Arzu and I put one vase on the table in the living room and another one on the cabinet in the corner. Then she finally decides to plop down on one of the floor pillows, crosses her arms on the table and rests her head on top, captured completely by the marvelous display of colors in front of her and the sweet smell that had already began spreading.

Grabbing the pillow next to hers, I kneeled on it, wrap my arms around the girl’s waist and hug her, nuzzling between her ears, placing a soft kiss on her head. She responds by turning her head toward me and licks my cheek, not once but three times.

“Do you like ‘em?” she asks, ears going up slightly, the corners of her beak curving upwards. Her eyes glitter with pride, hoping for a kind of praise from my side. I gently pet her head, her soft ears folding under the slight pressure I put on them but my thoughts drift off again. She purrs lightly in response but when my reply doesn’t come the purring stops and I’m suddenly aware of her ears having lost their will to spring back up by themselves. “Mommy? What’s wrong?”

Arzu grabs a pillow too and kneels down on my other side, flinging his arm around my shoulders. Touching the soft tip of his beak to my cheek, I feel the warm air flowing out of his nostrils tickling my skin.

“N-Nothing. I’m fine.” When I look at Arzu I can see that he worries about me. But when I tell them I’m still caught up in my memories he shakes his head, brushing through my long slightly curly hair with his clawed hand. My daughter crawls into my lap, placing her head on my belly. “Of course I like your flowers, sweetheart.”

Rubbing behind her ear, I can hear her purr in response.

***

I heard Niryn heave an audible sigh of relief after unlocking and opening the door. At least her mate and son made it home safely. Since they used their own car to drive to the nearest hospital there was a smaller chance they would run into any trouble as the conservatives seemed to leave Mantrins alone. Vehicles for Mantrins often had modified designs to better accommodate their physiology so it was visibly different from vehicles most humans drove. Within seconds I would have to face Arzu, tell him my parents were about to leave and that I had made up my mind about his idea of going to Sogowa. He told me to forget he ever said that but it hasn’t gone out of my head ever since. I sat motionlessly on the pillow, sipping from the warm contents of the cup I held firmly in both hands. I heard them exchange a couple of words in their own language. It could be about anything, the current situation in town, if they ran into any trouble, how it went at the hospital, but I thought I heard my name which wasn’t that strange. None of them expected me to run halfway through town for whatever reason at this moment. His approach was announced by the slow thumping steps of his feet on the stone floor. His tail tapped the floor lightly as he took position close to the table and to me. Putting the half empty cup down on the table I looked up, expecting to see the usual kind and maybe somewhat relieved look on his face. However, I never expected what actually happened. I already told you that Arzu had never been angry with me. It’s true, although this moment could’ve made me doubt about it for a second. I don’t think he meant to sound or appear angry but even if he was, he wasn’t angry at me. He was angry at the thought of what could have happened. Of losing me forever.

“Hi... Arzu. I’m glad to see you.”

He was breathing slightly faster than normal, a bit heavier too and through his nose only, his mighty chest expanding and collapsing visibly. His ears seemed to be in a lower position than usual and his amber-colored eyes had lost that fond look, a bit narrowed but not enough for true aggressiveness. His voice however clearly had more strength as he spoke and he was unable to keep the combination of anger and concern from seeping into his tone.

“You never should’ve come!” Although I had no trouble reading his face, I was still somewhat unprepared for it. I don’t think I can ever get used to feeling Arzu’s anger just because I know he’s not like that and doesn’t even want to be. But this time, I think I really got him upset and it was my own fault. My lips quivered. I think I wanted to apologize or explain or a combination of both but all I could do under his glare was stammer a few lost words. “How could you put yourself in danger like that, Rachel? And all because of me?”

“No.”

I sniffled. My nose was still a bit runny from crying and his somewhat harsh tone brought my closer to doing that again. It wasn’t like shouting. If he had been shouting I would’ve temporarily lost my hearing on at least one side. But due to his powerful voice, it quickly had the tendency to sound like shouting. I just thought he would be happy to see me. But I had to admit to myself that he was right. I had risked a lot just so I could be with him but I don’t think Niryn told him the real reason for my being here just yet. Still, behaving angrily toward me like that was painful. But just like I had been angry with him one time, I guess there had to come a first time when it would sort of happen the other way around. But before I could explain, Niryn and Reyzan entered the living room. I suspected they had been waiting to give us a moment but she felt the need to intervene when she noticed I was struggling in my current condition under her son’s somewhat harsh response.

“Arzu!” She sounded somewhat aggravated. Clearly she hadn’t accounted for a response like that either. “Would you give her a moment to explain? I think you’ll find it easier to understand her reasons.”

I heard how he took a deep breath and sighed. He looked at him. He nodded faintly, absent-mindedly rubbing the back his neck with his right hand.

“M-My parents are leaving Solbrecht. They don’t want to go through this again. But I don’t wanna go with them. I wanna stay with you.” I swallowed or at least tried to. My throat felt a bit soar. “But if you think I should be with my parents, then this is probably the last time we’ll see each other.” Farewell Arzu. I hope you’ll find someone to be happy with.

I almost wanted to add that and in my thoughts I did. But from the first sentence onward,  I noticed the slight moment of shock and realization on his face. I don’t think he ever accounted for the possibility that it would come to this.

“I didn’t know. Sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. I-I’m not mad at you. But you had me really worried.”

I nodded, giving him a sign that it was okay. Stepping closer to me he grabbed one of the other floor pillows, placed it close to mine and kneeled on both his middle leg segments. Sitting like that he was still much taller than me, so I turned to reposition myself in a similar fashion and face him directly. Niryn whispered something to her mate and they both walked out of the room, very thoughtfully granting us a moment alone. In the meantime Arzu’s ears had sagged a bit and the expression on his face had softened. Whatever anger he had felt had vanished into thin air. Right now he was back to his old kind self, visibly feeling guilt-ridden for his slight outburst, the way he looked at me. Then he slowly stretched out his arm, cupping the side of my face into the soft and warm palm of his hand, apologizing once more in a very sincere way. Really feeling the need for one of his hugs right now, I got up and wrapped both my arms round his neck, holding him tight. His own arms found themselves behind my back, holding me firmly but not uncomfortably. With my head resting on his shoulder, he touched the side of his own face to mine, taking slow deep breaths.

“It’s all right. I forgive you. You were just worried. I’ve been stupid.”

“No. You’re not stupid. It’s just... I can’t believe you care about me that much. So much that you’d risk your own life. Don’t do that, Rachel. Please?”

I nodded on his shoulder.

“Yes.”

After receiving my confirmation he hugged me a little more firmly and purred lightly. I was the first to try and detach myself from him, gently placing my hands on both sides of his beak, placing a soft kiss on top. He responded by licking my cheek and chuckled afterwards.

“Sorry, that one was really wet.”

I merely laughed in response as he grabbed the front of his shirt and playfully wiped my cheek with it. I think my laughter gave Arzu’s parents a sign too as they both reentered the living room, Niryn smiling, Reyzan greeting me in a somewhat casual way. We hadn’t discussed the problem about my parents leaving yet but telling him about it made me feel better. And then I suddenly remembered that I still had to call them. I wasn’t quite sure how I could forget about that but I did. Even if I didn’t agree with my father’s decision, the least I could do was tell them I was all right.

“I need to call my parents.”

He gave me a quick nod and a soft pet on the head.

“You better do that. I can’t imagine them not being worried.”

Pushing himself away from the pillow he rose back on his mighty legs, spreading them as he stepped backwards, his tail lightly sweeping the floor.

“How did it go? Is your tail all right?”

He smiled, looking over his shoulder, lashing it left and right in a calm way.

“I’m fine, thanks. The doctors said it was somewhat expected.”

“And why was that?” Niryn demanded to know, crossing her arms, the way she asked that betraying that she already kind of knew the answer.

She just wanted to hear him admit it. Arzu’s right ear lowered. He suddenly looked at the floor, tapping the toes of his feet.

“Because... I didn’t want to take the medicine the first time.”

“So you risked an infection, which is exactly what you got.”

He bit his lip. Now he was forced to admit that his mother was right and that I had been right the first time. He also blushed a bit with only his cheeks developing a slight red tint.

“Yeah, you were right, Rachel. I was stubborn. I probably should’ve taken it.”

I shook my head and couldn’t resist smiling. Placing both my hands on his muscular chest, I playfully tapped my fingers. The tip of his beak almost touched my forehead as he looked down.

“Next time, if you don’t wanna listen to the doctor, try to listen to someone closer to you who wants to be one.”

He hummed in response. Niryn uncrossed her arms, her voice softening as she stepped toward us.

“Call your parents, Rachel. They’re worried. The phone’s over there.”

She was right. Even if I expected my father to get angry and yell at me, I felt obligated to let them know, maybe even apologize. They were my parents after all. But I just couldn’t let them drag me with them. I was about to turn 18 Earth years old. Old enough to make certain decisions on my own, including those that would determine the course of my life. So I let the phone dial the number of our house phone, which was conveniently saved in the contact list. At least it displayed a spinning icon and a ‘connecting’ message on the projected display which could only mean that our house hadn’t burned down in the meantime. Still, they answered the phone fairly quickly. I could see them both but my dad was on the forefront and he was angry as expected but also relieved. My mother had her hand on her chest and did her best to stay calm, something in which she succeeded much better now that she knew I was okay.

“Mom, dad, it’s okay. I’m at Arzu’s house. I just--”

“Have you gone completely mad?” He did his best not to yell outright but failed miserably at that. I wasn’t overwhelmed or intimidated in the least. I had completely prepared myself for this kind of response. He was right. It was reckless and I could have gotten killed. I already realized that myself, Arzu emphasized it just a moment ago and now it was my dad’s turn to yell it into my face one more time. “Rachel, we’ve been worried sick about you. Do you even realize what could’ve happened? You’re our one and only daughter. What in the name of the universe went through you when you ran out on us like that? In the middle of this... war.”

“Dad! Listen, I’ve been giving it some thought. You wanna go back to Earth and--”

“And you’re coming with us!”

So it was true. Now Arzu and his parents could hear for themselves that it wasn’t just something I made up for whatever reason. And my father hadn’t changed his mind. He had seen more than enough this evening. Enough to make my parents and quite possibly many others realize that humans weren’t welcome anymore on Solbrecht. For him it was the last straw. This time I didn’t think I could change his mind. I got my parents to accept Arzu. Accept the idea that we would become mates. They even liked him when they finally shook hands, the human way. But they were genuinely preparing to leave the planet and they were not planning to leave me behind, in no one’s hands, no matter how capable or caring. Still I had to try.

“Dad, please. Arzu and I already talked about this. I wanna stay with him. We’ve found a way for us to be together.”

But he shook his head.

“Nothing of the sort will happen. Can’t you see by now that this has been a very bad idea all along? You both could’ve been killed. I don’t think so. You’re our daughter and you’re coming with us, like it or not. If I have to drag you down to the space port then so be it. This discussion is over!”

“Dad!”

“The police is finally getting things back under control. Stay where you are. We’re coming to get you.”

“No! Please dad.”

“Kevin, let’s just sit down and talk about it for a moment, okay?”

“No, Laura. The time of talking is over. I think we’ve seen more than enough evidence of that.”

The discussion between my parents didn’t seem to be over yet and as it continued between them, I suddenly felt the weight of a large hand on my shoulder. Since I already told her and now that she had overheard everything, Niryn asked if she could talk to my parents instead. I think she felt that they were not going to listen to me no matter what I said. So I stepped aside to let her take the shot. I wasn’t sure if my father was prepared to listen to Arzu’s mother but she seemed determined to try her best.

“Mr. and Mrs. Sanchez, please.”

My dad, who had turned his back toward the phone to argue with my mom even though they were still on, turned around, somewhat aggravated by the interruption.

“What do you want? She’s our daughter. We’re taking her with us. Period.”

Even I thought he was being rude toward Niryn even though she hadn’t said anything yet. But she kept her cool, keeping the memory of that short-tempered teenage girl that she used to be at a distance, taking a slight breath before speaking.

“Mr. Sanchez, listen. Over the past few weeks, I’ve gotten to know your daughter. I’ve been aware that she and my son have been in love for quite a while now. Don’t you think it’s only fair that--”

“This is not about love!” he interrupted her. “This has nothing to do with being fair. This has become a matter of life and death. And trust me, I’ve seen more than enough to determine for myself that your people would rather want to see a lot of the latter.”

Now he was just generalizing. I couldn’t blame Niryn if she felt insulted by that remark. They weren’t all like that. I had seen with my own eyes, Mantrins helping out humans during this conflict. And even the conservatives themselves still had some sense of morality left in them. I was convinced that large Logri Mantrin tried to get that little girl out of danger, just because she was a mere child. A child that age didn’t even know what hatred was. She was unaware of the harsh world that she was born into. Even he could see that and had therefore tried to prevent her from getting harmed.

“Now you listen to me!” Niryn grunted, irritated by his tone toward her and essentially her entire species. Now I could feel that my father had finally touched a rather sore spot. The change in her tone of voice had an instant intimidating effect. I told her I was afraid to witness her anger and right now I got a pretty good idea of what it would be like. “I am deeply sorry for what you have witnessed tonight. They are my people and they are entitled to their own opinion but they have no right to resort to the kind of violence that shocked all of us. My mate and I as well as our son, as you know quite well, do not support nor approve of any of their actions. I hope I made that clear.” My father wasn’t quite sure what to say. She made him realize he was wrong and he admitted his mistake, albeit a bit hesitantly. The sound of Niryn’s voice returned to its normal volume. “Good. Now, please listen. I know it’s hard to accept but your daughter has grown up, just like my son. She will soon be old enough to make her own decisions, if she isn’t already. Trust me, I’ve gotten to know her quite well.” She let out a soft grunt. My mom and dad listened intently. They began to understand that their daughter had began talking to others too about her problems. About things that bothered her. “For once, listen to your daughter. To what she wants. Have you thought about that when you made a decision that will totally change the outcome of her life?”

“No,” my father said eventually. Burying his hand in his curly black hair, scratching absent-mindedly. “No I haven’t. But we’re going back to Earth.”

“That is your decision,” Niryn said calmly, with a nod. “But I think your daughter has made one for herself.”

Gesturing me to get closer, I let her do a step back and moved myself back in front of the camera.

“Dad? When I had that talk with Arzu, we also discussed ways for us to be together. I’m not sure if you like it but--”

“No, Rachel.” When I looked at Niryn she shook her head. “This is not about what he likes. This is about what you want. Tell him.”

I nodded and looked my dad in the eyes again.

“Dad... Arzu and I have planned to go to Sogowa. They’re very friendly toward humans and other races. It’s a way for us to be together and that way no one will bother us with it.”

My dad visibly gave the idea I just printed into his mind a long and hard thought. He sighed. His face twisted as if he were in some sort of pain. I think my father was having a really hard time accepting that he had to let me go.

“Rachel.”

I don’t think I had ever seen my dad so emotional. His dull green eyes suddenly look very moist. Soundless tears ran down my mother’s cheeks and he was having a lot of trouble keeping his cheeks dry too. His voice scratched as he spoke.

“Dad.”

“You’re our daughter.”

“I know, dad. And I’ll always be your daughter. But... but I love Arzu. And I can’t leave him. I wanna be with him. Please.”

After what felt like an eternity of silence, he finally nodded.

“We’ll drop by tomorrow morning. We’ll talk this through. Rachel, if this really is what you want, then...  then I can’t--”

“It’s all right, dad. Tomorrow.”

He nodded. Stepping away from the phone, he created a little space for my mom.

“Is everything all right, sweetheart?”

I nodded, even though I could still feel the sore spot from that bump on my head. It didn’t really hurt but it was still present, although I didn’t tell her that.

“I’m fine, mom. Don’t cry. Even without you leaving now, I was gonna leave the house sooner or later. I can’t stay with you forever.”

She nodded, wiping her cheeks, pulling her curly hair, the same as mine out of her face.

“But you’re gonna be so far away from us. Let’s talk tomorrow.”

“Sure. Mom, is everything all right there?”

I wasn’t quite sure if she was nodding or shaking her head. Clearly a little bit of both as the answer had two sides.

“We’re fine. They were about to set fire to our house too when the police arrived just in time. But Rachel, a lot of people have been injured or even killed, including our neighbor from across the street, Mr. Evans. So many bodies. I can’t believe they would throw away their own lives just to make a stand.” I couldn’t believe that either. I couldn’t believe they were capable of such violence. Even members of their own kind got killed. My mother heaved a deep sigh. “I hope you can stay the night. The authorities have taken control of the situation but it’s still dangerous. I hope you’re not a burden.”

“That is quite all right,” Niryn said immediately, stepping closer, gently rubbing my shoulder, pulling me a little closer to her in a caring and protective gesture. “Besides, if you decide to leave Solbrecht, your daughter’s going to need some place to stay. And she can stay for as long as she likes.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much. I-I don’t know what to say.”

“It’s okay. We’d be glad.”

“Bye Rachel. See you tomorrow.”

“Bye mom. Bye dad.”

After that talk with my parents, I sat together with Arzu and his parents for just a short while, following the end of the conflict in our town on TV before we went upstairs. Finally some peace returned to our town but the aftermath was just as terrible. A total of sixty-seven dead, including humans, Mantrins, a pair of Akrennians and even a number of Solbrechtians and many more injured, some of them severe. The events would later be known as ‘The Black Night’, due to the blood that had been shed and due to the smoke of burning houses that had been detected even by a neighboring town. It turned out that Niryn had already eaten on her own and Arzu and his father picked up something at the hospital’s cafeteria since they had to wait for Arzu’s tail to be treated. That evening I laid next to Arzu in his bed. Just like the last time an extra pillow and my underwear and shirt for pajamas were enough. I don’t know what it was. I crawled pretty close to his warm body that night, to the point that I left the pillow for what it was and used his bare chest as a substitute. He didn’t even mind at all, placing his arm carefully on top of me, taking extra care trying to avoid scratching me with his claws. We didn’t talk much but we both knew tomorrow was going to be tough. Despite those thoughts, I fell asleep pretty quickly.

The next day, shortly after breakfast, my parents arrived at Arzu’s house. Due to the events of the night before, the school was closed anyway so there was no need for us to hurry or take a leave of absence. It was a day of mourning for those who had lost their lives. That morning I gave Clara a call too. She and her parents were okay, though of course shocked by everything they had witnessed but others were less fortunate. I heard from her that apparently, one of my classmates lost a parent and I heard from Clara that Weyah’s father was severely injured. She was a Mantrin. Her father had tried to help his human fellow citizens and paid dearly for it. Of course I told her my parents were planning to leave. I wouldn’t keep that from my best friend.

“Y-You’re not leaving too, aren’t you?”

I shook my head. I could see it in her eyes. She was concerned that were finally going to part after all those years. But at least I could give her some good news.

“No. No, I’m staying but I don’t know for how long.”

“But why?” I took a deep breath. And so I told her. Arzu joined us in the conversation eventually, flinging his arm around my shoulder, placing me with my lower back against his left thigh. We told her what we came up with and even she had to conclude, although with understandable hesitation that it was probably the best thing we could do, if we wanted to stay together. The chime of the doorbell announced the arrival of my parents. It was time. “I’m gonna miss you.”

“Don’t worry. I’m not gone yet. I’ll drop by later today okay? I know I promised we would go out together but I think we’d better have a long talk first. My parents are here. I’ll see you later.”

“Good luck, Rachel. Bye.”

“Bye.”

Clara hung up. Arzu looked at me, a somewhat saddened look in his amber-colored eyes. He felt too that it was difficult for me.

“Rachel, are you sure that--”

“Yes, Arzu.”

Before he could finish I hugged him, placing my head on his chest. He hugged me back in response. We stood like that while Niryn opened the door to let my parents in. Reyzan was still home too, having taken a day off work. They were still looking for more volunteers to help with the cleanup. He told us he was going to help too later this day. When my parents entered the living room they rushed toward us. I detached myself from Arzu to receive my mother’s long and firm hug. She was a bit emotional and so was my dad, glad to see I was okay, saddened because this was our goodbye. My father kept his word. The car was packed with their most valuable belongings. They were going to come back to pick up the rest later but that could take a while.

“We’re gonna have to find a place to live first,” my dad said. “I don’t expect it’ll take long. We’re gonna be staying at your aunt’s in the meantime.” They brought a large suitcase with some of my stuff too as well as my schoolbag and my phone. As it would turn out later my parents weren’t the only humans who were emigrating. In the end, it was a kind victory in favor of the conservatives. The cost was high but it seemed to have had some effect. The buildup of hatred on both sides and the increased violence as of late had finally tipped the scale. But these were my parents. My mother and father with whom I had lived my entire life on Solbrecht. My mother cried and even my father wiped at his eyes, after holding me in a long and firm embrace. Even Niryn wiped away a tear. Her mate stood behind her with his arms crossed in front of her chest, nuzzling against her cheek with his beak. “My beautiful daughter.” Touching my face with his fingertips, he still tried to smile. Despite the tears, pride glittered in his eyes too. “You’ve come such a long way already. I’m not even going to ask you if you’re ready to do it alone from now on, because I know you can. But be more careful. Promise me that.”

“I promise, dad. I love you.” I hugged my father again, one more time. “And I don’t have to do it alone.”

“Of course not.” Holding me at a slight distance by my shoulders, he looked at Arzu. “You’ve got him. And to be really honest, I don’t think you could’ve made a better choice.”

My mother talked to Arzu. She was still so concerned, so hesitant to let me go. She wanted to be absolutely sure I was in good hands, that I had someone to support me during difficult times. And of course I would be there for him too if he needed me. But she wanted to hear it from his mouth.

“Promise me, you’ll take good care of her. I really hope to see you two again very soon but I’m not entirely sure when that will be.”

Placing his large hand to cover my mother’s in comparison frail shoulder he made a slight bow with his head.

“I promise. Nyeworhe huraseh mih.”

He didn’t explain and he didn’t have too. After those words, he gave my mother one of those big hugs because he felt she needed it, not that long but afterwards she briefly caressed the side of his soft beak.

“You’re so sweet.”

“And you better be good to her, son,” my father warned him but with a smile. “But I know you will.” He then turned toward me again, handing me the key card of our house, placing if firmly in my hand, very trustfully.

“Here’s the key so you can get your stuff. Make sure to lock everything down. We’ve asked the neighbors to keep an eye out, but quite a few are thinking about leaving too. Some of them didn’t even have a choice.”

“Yes dad.”

Then he asked Niryn and Reyzan to take good care of me. They of course promised too.

“She’ll be like our own daughter. You can trust me on my word.”

I followed my parents as they left, out of the house to the car. I received a last hug from my mom before she stepped in. I continued to wave until I couldn’t see them anymore. My parents left Solbrecht for good and I would soon follow them, just not in the same direction. I did not expect never to return here. Solbrecht was a world on which I made a lot of very good memories. Just like almost every other thing, it was simply not supposed to last forever.